On 177 I travel home on day 178 I travel to visit a mum and her 4 and 1/2 year old daughter who have offered to hold my hand. Both days speak of connection.
Holding hands with a 4 and 1/2 year old brings to the forefront the idea of duration and what it can mean to attach yourself to someone for 30 minutes. In many ways for someone so young I think the action can be one which disconnects them from their world and from discovering it. It’s an act of control which doesn’t offer them the freedom or level of exploration they would normally have and so it is in no way as exciting as it is for someone older. Perhaps it is also about the intellectual approach that takes place in my daily practice, for my 4 and 1/2 year old friend holding hands is an unquestioned act. She tells me she holds her friend’s hand all the time simply because she likes them.
So what makes it different for me. Is it the excitement of disconnecting myself from the norm and playing with an action that has specific categories in my culture?Do i enjoy breaking the rules? Is it that I find it connects me more to my life – Day 177 being the 3 rd time I’ve held hands with my mum this year something that before now I hadn’t done for years.
My 4 and 1/2 year old friend didn’t quite manage 30 minutes hand holding but we did play together for that length of time and a little longer now again she would return to hold my hand. For the full-time we played, she attended to me, introduced me to her world. I became her friend Martha in some flats she had built, was introduced to Blythe the bear and instructed on how to choose her an outfit, in many ways I felt held by her generosity.
Her mum did manage to hold my hand for 30 minutes even as duty called. I’m privileged to bear witness to these moments and become part of them. I’m still fascinated that people ask to hold my hand and remain curious to the discussion. Perhaps the action is a little like my own daily play time.
Day 179 solidifies my actions celebration of Kinship. The roots of this action lie in the people I love the most it often offers up the most complicated and complex moments of my discoveries. a fitting fact for those I consider to be my kin.